It is said, "The wife is one-half of the body". So her death is very
painful. This pain is however due to one's outlook being physical; it
disappears if the outlook is that of the Self. The Brahadaranyaka
Upanishad says , "The wife is dear because of the love of the Self". If
the wife and others are identified with the Self, how then will pain
arise? Nevertheless such disasters shake the mind of philosophers also.
We are happy in deep sleep. We remain then as the pure Self. The same
we are just now too. In such sleep there was neither the wife nor others
nor even `I'. Now they become apparent and give rise to pleasure or
pain. Why should not the Self, which was blissful in deep sleep,
continue its blissful nature even now? The sole obstruction to such
continuity is the wrong identification of the Self with the body.
The Bhagavad Gita says: "The unreal hath no being; the real never cease to be; the truth about both hath been perceived by the seers of
the essence of things." "The real is ever real, the unreal is ever
unreal." Again: "He is not born, nor doth he die; nor, having been, cease he anymore to be; unborn, perpetual, eternal ancient, he is not
slain when the body is slaughtered." Accordingly, there is neither birth
nor death. Waking is birth and sleep is death.
Was the wife
with you when you went out to the office, or in your deep sleep? She was
away from you. You were satisfied because of your thought that she was
somewhere. Whereas now you think that she is not. The difference lies in
the different thoughts. That is the cause of pain. The pain is because
of the thought of the wife's non- being. All this is the mischief of the
mind. The fellow (i.e. the mind) creates pain for himself even when
there is pleasure. But pleasure and pain are mental creations.
Again, why mourn the dead? They are free from bondage. Mourning is the chain forged by the mind to bind itself to the dead.
- from Talk 203 (17th June, 1936) of 'Talks with Sri Ramana Maharshi'
